This year is all about cleaning out my stash; all of my #MakeNine2019 sewing projects are stash-related. However, in considering my sewing goals, I focused entirely on apparel. It simply never dawned on me to think about anything else. I still had some beautiful yardage that was part of a Christmas present from my mother in 2003 – a vibrant dragon print brocade. I’ve been wanting to develop a real meditation practice, and decided this piece of brocade would be perfect for making a Zafu pillow. I figured that after 15 years of waiting, this fabric deserved to become something useful.

Top and bottom:
The beauty of making it myself is that I was able to choose whatever size I wanted. I had a Zafu pillow years ago that was about 12 inches in diameter. I decided to go with 15 inches. Using a piece of old cardboard, I made a 16 inch circle as a pattern (1/2 seam allowance all the way around). I traced and cut out two of these from the fabric.

Sides:
I completely fudged it. First, I decided to make the depth of my cushion 9 inches (looking at Zafus online for guidance). With seam allowances, that’s 10 inches. Using math (gawd help us all) I calculated the circumference of my circle in order to determine the length of the piece going around the sides:

C = πd

Since I know the diameter of the circle is 16 inches, I calculated the circumference as a smidge over 50 inches. In order to put in the pleats, I would have to determine not only how wide each pleat would be, but the total amount of over- and underlap. This is the point where I said, “Eff it!” The piece I had was 2 yards, or 72 inches. I cut a 10 inch strip along the entire length of one side and hit the ironing board. I began to press pleats into the fabric visually, making them as identical as possible. I made sure to leave enough length at the front end to fold over for the addition of velcro strip:

I knew that at some point I would have to add on to this long pleated strip, as 72 inches folded over into pleats is not adequate to make it 50 plus inches and then some. There were more than enough fabric bits left to add in another 10 inch wide chunk. I simply hid the seam inside the pleat. I kept up the pleating until I reached my desired length, then added enough extra for the velcro at the other end. At this point, I stay stitched the pleats in place along both sides. Then I sewed in the velcro. To attach the circles, I pinned everything in place, making sure that the velcro parts were overlapping such that when I flipped the finished zafu right side out they would be lined up:

 

Filling:
As you can see in the photo, I filled my Zafu with styrofoam. They are typically filled with buckwheat hulls. However, my Fella and I used to have these chairs from Walmart called ‘Big Joe’ that came filled with styrofoam pellets. After the chairs fell apart (shocker), I saved all the styrofoam. Every piece of styrofoam from those chairs ended up in my Zafu. They really, really squish down, and the beauty of second-hand pellets is that they are already partially squished. As they squish down more, I’ll add buckwheat hulls as needed.

It is really important to me to use those styrofoam pellets as long as possible. At the time we bought them, his family was coming for the holidays and we owned very little furniture. Our budget was so tight, we ended up with inflatables and bean bag chairs. It was the best we could do at the time, but yeah… a little bit of my earth-loving self died inside. I’m not sending those pellets to the landfill along with everything else. There are also packing peanuts in there.

Well, there you have it! One meditation cushion, ready to go. The average price online seems to be $79.00. Total cost of mine? $0! Now, to learn how to sit still…

Things I Sew

I am a big fan of Ayurvedic Medicine. I took a course during my naturopathic education under Dr. Robert Svoboda, and have continued to learn about it and practice the principles over the years. According to Ayurveda, I am a Vata-Pitta, heavy on the Vata. I won’t go into details about this – there are plenty of great resources – but I take a very individualized approach to my health, always striving for balance. Therefore, the following recipe should not be taken as a health recommendation or a one-size-fits-all product. However, it is very simple to adjust ingredients to what suits your needs and basic constitution. Oil pulling is controversial for some people, but to me it makes sense, in the same way that washing my face in oils makes sense. I’m not going into any of that here, but each person should research it and decide for themselves. I’ve been experiencing a toothache lately and won’t be able to get to my holistic dentist in the immediate future. You can do oil pulling without essential oils, but I’m adding a few to help with my current situation.

Here’s the recipe:

• 1/4 cup Sesame oil
• 1/4 cup Coconut oil
• 20 drops Cardamom essential oil
• 20 drops Clove bud essential oil
• 10 drops Pink pepper essential oil

The process is simple:  If your coconut oil is solid, put oils into a pan on low heat. As soon as coconut oil melts remove from heat. Allow to cool for a couple of minutes, then pour into a 4 ounce bottle. If your coconut oil is already in liquid form, simply measure out your oils and place them directly into your 4 ounce bottle. Add essential oils to the bottle. Shake vigorously. By the following morning, all the oils will have fully blended and it’s ready to use. To learn all about it, go to https://eatfeelfresh.com/how-to-oil-pull-like-a-boss/

Ingredient actions:

• Sesame oil:  Warming, counterbalancing Vata’s cold body and digestive fire
• Coconut oil:  Whitening; counterbalance heat from Pitta excess during sleep (night sweats and heat from hormonal changes and Lyme flare-ups)
• Cardamom EO:  Anti-infective, antibacterial; stimulates and tones the digestive tract; has antiseptic properties that stimulate the phagocytic cellular action of the immune system; balancing and harmonizing
• Clove bud EO:  Analgesic (pain-relieving); relieves toothaches, freshens breath; antibacterial, antifungal, antiviral; boosts immune system and stimulates blood flow [eugenol, esters, and sesquiterpenes combine to act against pathogens and microbes; helps gum infections.
• Pink pepper EO: Helps maintain healthy cellular function and overall cellular health; increases circulation; antiseptic, antiviral, and stimulant; anti-inflammatory and pain-relieving; uplifting and energizing, invigorates mind, body and spirit.

Favorite sources used:

Things I Make

Well, it’s a new season, both on the planet and in my life. Ever since I turned 46 last November, I’ve noticed some changes. These changes have already been there for a while, but now they’re right in the forefront of my life. Coupled with a difficult period with chronic Lyme disease, I decided to design a medicinal tea for myself that I could enjoy daily as part of an overall protocol. Here are the issues I am addressing: chronic widespread inflammation; joint pain from Lyme arthritis; estrogen dominance and symptoms of hormonal imbalance; abdominal pain from flatulence and weakened digestion in general; night sweats and hot flashes; painful menstruation and periods; pain and fatigue both pre- and post- menstruation; poor appetite and energy; constipation; improved detoxification; chronic urinary tract problems; improvement of circulation of blood and lymph; strengthen immune system and provide vitamins and minerals. There is much more to it, as these symptoms are part of an overall picture both physically and energetically. The picture is one of deficiency.

Please note that I am designing a formula that is specific to me, and I have had professional training in medical herbalism, though I am always learning, improving and modifying. I like to share my process to encourage others in their health journey, not to give medical advice. In considering where I am at right now, and listening to my body as it gives me important information on what it needs, I chose the following herbs:

Here’s the recipe: (I make 1/2 gallon at a time, as a replacement for morning coffee)

• 1 part Nettle leaf (2 Tbsp dried herb)
• 1 part Rosehips flower (2 Tbsp dried herb)
• 2 parts Wild Yam root powder (1/2 Tbsp dried herb)
• 1 part Red clover (2 Tbsp dried herb)
• 1 part Dandelion leaf (2 Tbsp dried herb)

Here’s the process:

Decoction: Place nettle leaf, rosehips, and wild yam root into water. Bring water slowly to a low boil, then reduce heat. Add red clover (has some woodier bits along with the leafy bits). Simmer mixture for about 20 minutes. Remove from heat.

Infusion: Add dandelion leaf and allow mixture to steep as it cools down.

Poor tea through fine mesh strainer into 1/2 gallon container. Add water to replace that which has boiled off.

Drink about one cup daily. Mixture will be bitter with an underlying sweetness. Great replacement for morning coffee.

Herbal actions:

• Dandelion leaf (Taraxacum officinalis): High in minerals (potassium, vitamins A, B, C, and D); detoxifying; clears blood and lymph by increasing elimination through the kidneys and bowels; stimulate production and release of bile; aids liver-related conditions like UTIs, painful menopause and menstruation; stimulates secretion of digestive fluids, promotes the appetite; strengthens the urinary system and helps with incontinence; relieves pain of arthritis and detoxifies joints; aids in healing of chronic illness and viral infections; helps anemia; aids water retention; prevents cell damage through free radical detoxification; stabilizes mood swings; helps anemia.
• Nettles (Urtica spp.): High in vitamins and minerals (excellent source of vitamin C, potassium, calcium, magnesium and silicic acid); antihistamine effect, useful for hay fever and allergies; enhances natural immunity, protecting from infections; reduces blood sugar levels and stimulates circulation; dilates peripheral blood circulation, promoting elimination of urine and lowered blood pressure; high in readily absorbable iron and chlorophyll, making it helpful for anemia; clears blood of urates and toxins; treats arthritis; reduces menstrual cramps; rejuvenator in chronic illness with long-term use; beneficial to urinary tract and kidneys; helps PMS.
• Red Clover (Trifolium pratense): High in trace minerals; blood cleanser; helps chronic constipation, chronic degenerative diseases; helps balance hormone levels during menopause and relieves symptoms like hot flashes; reduces and clears excess estrogen levels; improves elimination overall – helps body eliminate toxins through improved urine flow, moves mucous out of lungs, increases bile flow, acts as a gentle laxative.
• Rosehips (Rosa rugosa): High in vitamin C; fights free radicals and strengthens immunity; pain-relieving; aids urinary tract and kidney issues, and digestive distress; relieves phlegm and congestion; aids elimination through kidneys; improves general resistance and lightens mood.
• Wild Yam root (Dioscorea villosa): Useful for low progesterone/high estrogen related problems, aiding in painful menstruation, PMS symptoms, and menopausal symptoms; prevents osteoporosis; beneficial for arthritis by reducing joint inflammation; reduces imflammation and pain from intestinal cramping.

Favorite sources used: (Along with my notes and herbal monographs from Bastyr University, as part of my doctoral program in Naturopathic Medicine.)

Things I Make

You can’t control what people will or won’t like, so keep putting yourself out there, believe in what you’re creating, and let the chips fall where they may.

The other day I posted pictures of the brand new jumper I made on Instagram. It was a tedious project. First of all, it took way too long to complete because my heart wasn’t in it. I’m just not into sewing right now. I go through phases/seasons with my creativity, and this is not sewing season. I also felt ambivalent about the project, unsure if the dress would even come out well, wondering if my ambivalence would extend to the finished project. I just wasn’t feeling it. The other night I realized that I only had about 30 minutes of work left until I finished it, so I dropped everything and went for it. I just wanted to get it over with. The next day I wore it, took pictures, and posted it. Then I went away and ignored social media.

When I checked back in, the post had received over 1100 likes and over 60 comments! You could have knocked me over with a feather. I have never made it into the four digits before. I mean, I have around 300+ followers, and I’m pretty sure at least half of them aren’t even real people. The irony is that I almost didn’t post at all! In fact, I was starting to think about scrapping Instagram altogether.

The same thing happened back in February. I happen to own a Walmart track phone of the Samsung persuasion, and every time there’s an update, my picture quality falls apart. It’s a struggle to get the settings even remotely presentable. So, when I put on an older make, a long denim skirt, and only got grainy photos, I almost didn’t bother to post. Finally, I said eff it and posted anyway. I ended up with over 800 likes.

Neither of these posts were even remotely my favorites. I like the outfits, but the posts were afterthoughts to me; B-sides, if you will. Isn’t that how it is in the creative life? Just because something makes your heart sing, this doesn’t mean it will resonate with anyone else. And just because your response to something is ‘meh’ or you felt ‘meh’ while you created it, doesn’t mean other people’s hearts won’t sing when they encounter it. It might make your heart sing at some later moment, when you look back and think, “Wow, that was a lot better than I thought at the time.” But maybe not.

Sometimes our most memorable moments on the creative journey involve uninspired feelings, grainy photos, and a heavy dose of ambivalence. Maybe we’re having a bad hair day. Maybe we had a fight with our sweetie. Maybe we’re going through something and doing our best to get through it all. We aren’t always flying high on the wings of creative bliss, yet still we create. We continue to build. We continue to share the content of our creative process as we evolve – because it is a process. If success was built on feeling sparkly all the time, nothing truly good would ever come to fruition, and not everything that we’re enormously proud of will resonate with anyone but ourselves. Or our moms. Or our best friend Joanie from high school. That’s okay. Everything we encounter in the process makes us better at what we do, because at the end of the day I’m not creating for approval; I’m doing it because I must, because I’m wired to create.

If I love something and feel proud of it, that’s all that really matters. This is why I do it, to feel a strong sense of connection – with myself, my stuff, the world at large, the cosmic creative forces in the universe. A person who creates MUST create, in whatever way they are compelled to do so in the moment, including the ‘meh’ moments. The nagging feelings that bump you off the sofa and get you to finish something which isn’t inspiring you is still a form of MUST, the deep inner knowing that I don’t create just because I’m inspired, I create because I inspire others in turn, even if it’s just mom and Joanie and Joe Blo in tim-buk-tu who stalks me under the name ‘Susie Q’. Life is a collaboration, and all creativity is an exchange, a conversation with other people. This is the beauty of sharing, even when we aren’t feeling it.

So, we throw ourselves out there. We have no control over how something will or won’t be received. Finding the courage to do it at all is a sort of cliff jump into the unknown. Navigating the wilderness of other people and their thoughts, perceptions, and personal preferences is an arduous journey. That’s the nature of dialogue – you don’t get to control the conversation. It has a mind of its own. That’s the nature of the creative journey – it’s a story that is always unfolding. We are not the ones telling the story. The story is telling us; because the minute we think we know how it’s going to go, we encounter another character and all hell breaks loose. So, rather than worry about it, just put it out there. Let nature take its course. It’s amazing how often fresh inspiration comes from some random person who has an opinion or interpretation of what I’ve created that sparks my mind in a new direction. Someone mentioned that I should enter my jumper in the #sewbibs challenge. I hadn’t paid any attention to challenges and contests lately due to my ‘meh’ attitude, but I added it to my post as an afterthought. I clicked on the hashtag yesterday to see other makes and my post was in the top 9. Wow. Cool. Not to mention, seeing all those adorable overalls and pinafores sparked a little something in me, and I really needed the inspiration.

Thoughts From My Creative Journey
#LearnNine2019

My intention this year was to work my way through my stash, but I forgot to include one piece of fabric in my #MakeNine2019, a thrifted piece of dark olive-green nylon-blend fabric I found last year at Saver’s Thrift Store. I paid $2.99 for three yards at 45 inches wide. It had some streaks of fading from age, but not enough to really concern me – pants or something like that would be a no-go, but pleats would solve the problem. It sat there as I waited for it to tell me what it wanted to be, and last week it finally spoke. I kept seeing so many cute jumpers and pinafores all over social media, and rather than purchase one of the newer patterns out there, I went for one that has lingered in my stash over the years. I chose McCall’s 5577 (no longer in print):

Even though I purchased it ten years ago, I have continued to love it, and feel like it’s as relevant as ever. Not only are jumpers in style, but pleats have made a comeback. I never quite decided what color to make it in, not wanting the final product to look too juvenile, so this seemed like a great pairing. Considering the pattern cost $1.99, I am getting a cute new pinafore for only about five bucks. Score!

The layout was pretty straightforward. I basically had the exact right amount of fabric. This is why choosing the right project was key, considering that a clever layout scheme was going to work to hide the faded parts of the yardage. I added 2 inches into the length out of personal preference, and did my usual grading. I am always a size 12 in length on commercial patterns, but smaller in width, so grading between sizes is pretty standard for me:

This was not a hard project to put together, and I like how wearable this piece is. I used slightly lighter thread and added contrasting top-stitching. Since the fabric is sporty, I thought a little top-stitching would add to the sporty vibe. I used some pretty leaf buttons I’ve had in my stash for years:

Overall, I love the finished product, and I’m relieved that not only does it fit perfectly across the chest, but I can see myself keeping it in constant rotation. I was worried that I might not love it enough when it was finished to wear it very often. Total cost? Only 2.99 for the fabric and 1.99 for the pattern. Yay.

Things I Sew

Yesterday, I made a Regenerating Nighttime Facial Moisturizer. After using it last night, I decided to make a modified version to use during the day. Some of the ingredients have benefits that would make it perfect for daytime use, but the formula would need some adjustment. First, it is too thick and heavy with the shea butter. Even though my skin is generally dry, I do best with lighter ingredients which are easily absorbed. The thicker formula is fine at night, but twice daily would be too much. I also find that the glycerin contributes to this and would be best left out of a daytime formula. Glycerin does more plumping than actual moisturizing, and I may opt to stop using it in future formulas altogether. Second, as much as I love citrus in nighttime formulas, it can increase the skin’s sensitivity to UV rays, so I’m leaving it out. I’m adding lavender for its anti-inflammatory and skin-regenerating properties. My nighttime facial cleanser already has it, so I left it out of that moisturizer, but I want it as part of my morning routine. I increased the rose content, and left out ylang ylang, as it is deeply tranquilizing. I added green tea and aloe vera for the properties stated below. The process is similar to the other moisturizer, but I outlined the steps anyway, since it was modified a bit to accommodate the new ingredients.

Here’s the recipe:

• 1 Tbsp + 1tsp jojoba oil
• 2 tsp rosehip seed oil
• 1 tsp sea buckthorn oil
• 1 capsule evening primrose oil
• 1-1/2 tsp beeswax
• 1 tsp coconut oil
• 1 Tbsp strong green tea
• 1/2 tsp aloe vera gel
• 15 drops rose essential oil
• 10 drops lavender essential oil
• 10 drops vanilla essential oil

Here’s the process:

Make a small cup of very strong green tea. Allow to steep and cool while melting the oils/waxes:

Warm the base oils and beeswax over low heat until the solids are just melted. Cool the contents of the pan to almost body temperature until the oil/wax mixture barely turns opaque but is still liquid:

Add aloe vera gel to green tea and quickly drizzle the water/aloe mixture into the oil/wax mixture, stirring rapidly with a whisk as you go. Continue for 2-4 minutes until a rich gold emulsion forms:

Add the essential oils and rapidly stir for 4-5 minutes, or until mixture is cool. It will be a thick, shiny golden cream. Pour into desired container:

Ingredient actions:

• Jojoba oil:  Softening and moisturizing, closely emulating natural sebum in skin and normalizing sebum production; highly emollient and nutritive; easily absorbed; high in fatty acids, helping protect and reinforce top layer of epidermis; does not turn rancid and requires no refrigeration.
• Rosehip seed oil:  High in essential fatty acids, vitamins C & E, antioxidants, retinol-A, and antimicrobials; great for mature, environmentally damaged, prematurely aged, devitalized skin; lubricates dry skin, relieves itchy skin, relaxes wrinkles, softens scars, shrinks pores, remedies acne; contains elasticity-boosting lycopene.
• Sea buckthorn oil:  Extremely high concentration of fatty acids and vitamins (C, E, A, B1, B2 and B12), especially vitamin E, and more than 190 bioactive compounds per drop; perfectly balanced blend of omega 3-, 6-, 7- and 9- essential fatty acids; neutralizes actions of free radicals; rich in carotenoids, minimizing effects of exposure to the sun’s rays and soothes irritated skin; reduces inflammation, redness and water loss in skin cells; supports cell-regeneration; skin softening, revitalizes connective tissue, photoprotective (acts as a natural sunscreen).
• Evening primrose oil:  Made up of unsaturated fatty acids, phytosterols and triterpenes with restorative, healing, anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties; activates microcirculation, slows down skin aging, an protects from UV damage.
• Beeswax:  Thickener; soothing and antibiotic; adds a sweet, honey-like fragrance.
• Coconut oil:  Lighter than shea and other butters, but very moisturizing and easily absorbable for most skin types.
• Green Tea: Antimicrobial, antifungal and anti-inflammatory; soothes and calms irritated skin; high in antioxidants that fight aging (eliminates free radicals which cause fine lines and wrinkles); contains the antioxidant EGCG (effective in rejuvenating dying skin cells, reactivates reproduction of skin cells); high in vitamin B and vitamin E (maintain collagen production, increases elasticity, firms skin and prevents wrinkles, promote cell regeneration); hydrates and nourishes skin; unclogs pores, gently exfoliates, reduces puffiness and redness doe to caffeine; mildly SPF and minimizes UV damage.
• 100% Pure Aloe Vera Gel:  Cooling, mildly astringent, anti-inflammatory, and tissue-rejuvenating; restores and maintains skin’s natural pH; comforting and hydrating; revitalizes damaged and parched skin; rich in vitamin A (increases cell turnover and alleviates dark spots), vitamin C (stimulates microcirculation in the skin), vitamins B & E (helps the cells fight oxidative stress); high in minerals, trace elements and 18 amino acids.
• Lavender EO:  Antiseptic and anti-inflammatory; calms damaged skin; has cell-regenerating properties, making it useful for reducing wrinkles and scarring; calming and relaxing to the nervous system, aiding in sleep and relieving depression ; relieves blemishes.
• Vanilla EO:  Balances mood; reduces stress; calming; softens other fragrances; sedative (perfect for bedtime when paired with the sedative effects of lavender).
• Rose EO:  Skin cell regenerator, gentle antiseptic, mild astringent, mood elevator; especially useful for mature, sensitive and environmentally damaged skin; high in vitamin C (anti-aging by protecting against free radicals); smooths out fragile skin and finest areas and tones sensitive and weakened skin; refines skin and tightens pores; nourishes and protects skin from drying out.

Favorite sources used:

Things I Make

I’m due for a new moisturizer to use in my nighttime routine. I typically use pure oils, such as tamanu, olive, or jojoba, but I wanted to blend and experiment with some new oils and essential oil blends. Both the recipe and process below were adapted from the book, Pure Skin Care by Stephanie Tourles. I had already determined the ingredients I wanted to include and researched for guidance on how to put it all together. The original recipe, on page 159 of her book, was absolutely ideal. I might make a daytime version for the sake of the sun-protective properties of some of the ingredients – minus the sweet orange essential oil. Citrus essential oils increase photosensitivity, which we don’t want when we’re headed out the door into a bright Texas day. I would also change out the water for green tea, which has its own SPF properties.

Here’s my version of the recipe:

• 1 Tbsp + 1tsp jojoba oil
• 2 tsp rosehip seed oil
• 1 tsp sea buckthorn oil
• 1 capsule evening primrose oil
• 1-1/2 tsp beeswax
• 1 tsp shea butter
• 1 Tbsp distilled water
• 1/4 tsp vegetable glycerin
• 10 drops sweet orange essential oil
• 10 drops vanilla essential oil
• 5 drops ylang ylang essential oil
• 5 drops rose essential oil

Here’s the process: 

Warm the base oils, beeswax and shea butter over low heat until the solids are just melted:

In another tiny pan, gently warm the water and glycerin until the glycerin dissolves:

Cool the contents of both pans to almost body temperature until the oil/wax/butter mixture barely turns opaque but is still liquid. Quickly drizzle the water mixture into the oil/wax/butter mixture, stirring rapidly with a whisk as you go. Continue for 2-4 minutes until a rich gold emulsion forms:

Add the essential oils and rapidly stir for 4-5 minutes, or until mixture is cool. It will be a thick, shiny golden cream. Pour into desired container:

That’s it! We have a light, fragrant, highly nourishing nighttime moisturizer.

Ingredient actions:

• Jojoba oil:  Softening and moisturizing, closely emulating natural sebum in skin and normalizing sebum production; highly emollient and nutritive; easily absorbed; high in fatty acids, helping protect and reinforce top layer of epidermis; does not turn rancid and requires no refrigeration.
• Rosehip seed oil:  High in essential fatty acids, vitamins C & E, antioxidants, retinol-A, and antimicrobials; great for mature, environmentally damaged, prematurely aged, devitalized skin; lubricates dry skin, relieves itchy skin, relaxes wrinkles, softens scars, shrinks pores, remedies acne; contains elasticity-boosting lycopene.
• Sea buckthorn oil:  Extremely high concentration of fatty acids and vitamins (C, E, A, B1, B2 and B12), especially vitamin E, and more than 190 bioactive compounds per drop; perfectly balanced blend of omega 3-, 6-, 7- and 9- essential fatty acids; neutralizes actions of free radicals; rich in carotenoids, minimizing effects of exposure to the sun’s rays and soothes irritated skin; reduces inflammation, redness and water loss in skin cells; supports cell-regeneration; skin softening, revitalizes connective tissue, photoprotective (acts as a natural sunscreen).
• Evening primrose oil:  Made up of unsaturated fatty acids, phytosterols and triterpenes with restorative, healing, anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties; activates microcirculation, slows down skin aging, an protects from UV damage.
• Beeswax:  Thickener; soothing and antibiotic; adds a sweet, honey-like fragrance.
• Shea butter:  Skin-softening and emollient; high concentration of oleic and stearic fatty acids, rich in vitamins A and E as well as other vitamins and minerals; low-level of UV protection (approximately SPF-6); promotes hydration and suppleness of skin; reinforces acid mantle; alleviates patchy skin and accelerates cell turnover; protects against oxidation; improves circulation and absorbs UV rays.
• Vegetable glycerin:  Humectant, moisturizing, rehydrating; softens and soothes skin.
• Sweet orange EO:  Gently astringent, toning and antibacterial; calming effect; relieves anxiety.
• Vanilla EO:  Balances mood; reduces stress; calming; softens other fragrances; sedative (perfect for bedtime when paired with the sedative effects of lavender).
• Ylang ylang EO:  Deeply tranquilizing, relaxes muscles and central nervous system; balances mood, calms the mind, acts as an antidepressant; helps regulate sebum production.
• Rose EO:  Skin cell regenerator, gentle antiseptic, mild astringent, mood elevator; especially useful for mature, sensitive and environmentally damaged skin; high in vitamin C (anti-aging by protecting against free radicals); smooths out fragile skin and finest areas and tones sensitive and weakened skin; refines skin dnd tightens pores; nourishes and protects sking from drying out.

Favorite sources used:

Things I Make

It’s been a long time since I’ve made my own deodorant. I have been buying Tom’s of Maine or Kiss My Face and both work great for me. I like having store-bought faves of all my products for those times when making my own isn’t feasible. However, in terms of cost it makes sense to go back to making my own. I saved the empty container from my Tom’s of Maine deodorant and got to work. My favorite recipe comes from another blogger, Becoming Peculiar. When I came across this recipe, she had already updated her post to improve upon the recipe, and her husband had used it and approved of it. I find that it really works. You only need a few swipes, and it truly doesn’t melt. The only issue – it balls up in your pits if you put on too much, and the little balls fall out of your pits onto the floor if you’re wearing a short-sleeved shirt. Not glamorous. Moral of this story – a little goes a long way. This stuff really works, a testament to the power of tea tree oil.

Here’s the recipe:

• 1/4 cup corn starch
• 1/4 cup baking soda
• 3 Tbsp coconut oil
• 1 Tbsp grated beeswax
• 5 drops tea tree oil
• 5 drops lavender essential oil

Here’s the process:

• Melt the beeswax and coconut oil over low heat until the beeswax just melts, then remove from heat
• Add all other ingredients and throughly mix together until you get a creamy consistency
• Pour into container and allow to harden; you can place it in the refrigerator to speed up this process, but the finished product does not require refrigeration

That’s it. Simple. I see no point in re-inventing the wheel here, when someone else has already done such a great job coming up with something that works and ticks all the boxes of what I want in the finished product. It is so ridiculously easy and cheap to make your own deodorant I think everyone should do it. The natural versions are so expensive, and it’s challenging to find one that really works. On to the next…

Things I Make

Sometimes self-care is not about DOING something – it’s about NOT doing something, even though you want to so much.

About 20 years ago, I contracted Lyme disease while on a 16 mile training run in the woods outside of Portland, Oregon. I remember the day I woke up and was a completely different person than the day before. But no one was looking for Lyme disease back then, outside of a few places in the northeastern United States as outlined in the CDC guidelines. No one looked for it, no one tested for it, and if a patient suggested it, they were often ignored or mocked by their doctor. Lyme wasn’t on my radar at all, so five years later when one of my med school professors suggested it to me, it seemed far-fetched, even though she did a questionnaire with me where I answered 98 out of 100 questions with a wholehearted “Yes!” However, because she put Lyme on the forefront of my mind, when a student doctor made an affirmative diagnosis a year later I was ready to accept it.

Getting a diagnosis was a happy thing. After six years of being told it was all in my head, there was nothing wrong with me, my problems were psychological, I was a pretty girl wanting attention, etc, etc, I was finally able to say, “Suck it!” This is real and I was right all along. Of course, this lasted for all of about five minutes, once I realized that if you don’t catch it in the first few weeks when it’s still acute and treat it aggressively, it stays with you. I have not had the resources or support system over the years to do everything that could be done to give me a level of functioning that’s consistent and enables me to do many of the things we take for granted, like exercise regularly, work full-time, etc. These bugs quickly ate me out of house and home. There are times of productivity and periods of weakness. In 2006, when I started treatment, there were major aspects of the illness which had yet to be discovered, so we did the best we could at the time. Fast forward to 2019…

Sewing is something I’ve been doing my whole life. It’s an art form to me, my favorite creative escape. For me, sewing is self-care. It is a way to process emotions, express my true self, and put something positive out into the world. It contributes to good self-esteem. I rarely have to battle with fitting rooms, bad lighting, or changes in my physique, because I am empowered to grab the tape measure and Fiskars and get to work. I find a deeper connection to myself and my stuff, because my stuff comes out of my own imagination. Sewing is a desert island oasis, where I can reconnect with my inner artist while being my own muse, taking the space I need when the going gets tough. Things were tough in 2018, so I started 2019 with a hopeful outlook and a bunch of creative plans. I made my #MakeNine2019 collage with the intention of clearing out my stash, then moving on to bucket list sewing and other creative projects. Here are some examples:

• Make a motorcycle jacket out of an amazing Pendleton print
• Make a tailored classic blazer, like the new Jasika blazer from Closet Case Patterns
• Make a pair of Mukluks, and learn to make my own minimalist footwear
• Knit a sweater with lots of color and detail, like the Alyeska sweater from Caitlin Hunter
• Make a 40s-style swing coat from some black wool I have on hand with gorgeous printed lining

…among other things. My plans are ambitious. They always are. January was great, and I got off to a great start. But as February and March set in, I found the stress of the last year-and-a-half of my life had caught up with me, and I have felt more weak than I remember feeling for a long time. The combination of the healing of emotional trauma and going through age-related hormonal changes have caused my flare-ups to be bigger than they have been for a while. Last year this time I was sewing up a storm. But even the thought wears me out right now; between the bone/joint pain and fatigue, I sit here day by day watching my stack of future projects stay frustratingly untouched. I can’t predict what each day holds and I can’t control the cycles of the pathogens that share space with me in this body. It’s hard to say ‘no’ to things, people, activities, and a myriad of things that matter to me. It sucks when the best way to take care of ourselves is to distance ourselves for a time from that which makes our hearts sing.

Sick or not, the core issues are the same for all of us in this ridiculously busy modern world. I am a human being, not a human doing. We all go through times of boom vs. bust; seasons of productivity vs. rest. This is the way it’s supposed to be – just ask your friendly neighbors Mr. and Mrs. Squirrel. There’s a time to scurry and a time to nest. Sometimes we’re buzzing with the energy of new creation and expectation, and sometimes life takes us by the hand, leads us to the sofa for a session of binge-watching. It’s okay to listen to this voice and honor it. It comes from wisdom, something deep inside, wanting what’s best for us. Taking care of myself doesn’t always feel caring at the time, but it’s necessary in the grand scheme. I am going to let people down. I am going to have to cancel plans at the last-minute on occasion. I am going to have to sadly watch opportunities pass by, knowing that the deadline or expectations are not in my best interests.

People say, “Don’t say you ‘can’t’ do something. You can do it if you believe in yourself,” as though the concept of ‘can’t’ is merely the byproduct of a faulty mindset. They’re wrong. There absolutely is such a thing as ‘can’t.’ My elderly neighbor with severe osteoporosis and arthritis places her trash outside her front door for others to take out. Walking to the dumpster hunched over her walker, then heaving the bag over the top edge is hard. I’m 5’8″ and much younger and I can hardly get my own trash over the top. So, what good would it do if I said to her, “You should train for the upcoming marathon. Just believe in yourself enough and you can. Believe it and be it!” Gag. What an insensitive jerk I would be. She can’t. There are plenty of things she used to do that she can’t do anymore. But she’s happy and grateful – it’s been a long life full of blessings, along with the struggles, the bitter disappointments, the unexpected circumstances. It’s okay to say, I can’t do this today. I can’t do this right now. I can’t do this anymore. Hard as it may be, we can find peace in this by realizing that no is the flip side of yes. Life says ‘no’ to some things, but this creates space in our lives to say ‘yes’ to something else. We also have to realize that “I can’t” is the follow-up to “I need…” It’s okay to honor what we need. We are not saying our needs are more important than anyone else’s – we are just saying that they are not less important. We aren’t always given a choice. We want to so badly, but we just can’t today, and that’s okay.

Thoughts From My Creative Journey
#LearnNine2019

Last month, I made an herb-infused vinegar hair rinse. I have been struggling with age-related hormone changes and chronic health issues that have affected the texture and growth rate, hair loss from wearing it up in tight retro styles the past few years, and a flaky scalp. I’m already noticing an improvement. Before and after – there is already a difference in the thickness and body:

My current hair and scalp oil ran out, so I decided to focus the next one on the issues at hand. I like to massage a scalp treatment into my scalp once weekly and leave it on overnight, followed by no-poo shampooing and a vinegar hair rinse in the morning. The other mornings, since I shower cold (Yep, every morning), I rinse my hair and scalp thoroughly in the cold water. Afterward, I work a little of the oil through the lower half of my hair, focusing on the ends, and let it air dry.

As a guide, I adapted a recipe from the book Organic Body Care Recipes by Stephanie Tourles, and modified it based on my needs. I had researched a LOT of ingredient and recipe possibilities when I came across this one, and wasn’t interested in re-inventing the wheel. It had many components which I already planned on using, so it made for a perfect guide. Here’s my version of the recipe. It makes 4 oz. total.

1/4 cup Sesame oil
2 Tbsp Jojoba oil
2 Tbsp Castor oil
40 drops Rosemary essential oil
25 drops Sage essential oil
20 drops Lemon essential oil
15 drops Lavender essential oil
15 drops Lemongrass essential oil
10 drops Peppermint essential oil

Here’s the process:

Place all essential oils in empty container, drop by drop:

Measure out sesame, jojoba and castor oils in separate container:

Pour carrier oil blend into the container with the essential oils:

Put the top on the bottle and give it a vigorous shake. Let it sit for about 24 hours so the essential oils can continue to mix.

It’s ready to use! It can be massaged into the scalp prior to shampooing, or left on overnight (with old pillow case!) for deeper effects. Let’s see how it goes…

Ingredient actions:

Sesame oil:  Very nutritive, high in vitamins, minerals, proteins, lecithins, amino acids and phytosteroids (very moisturizing/conditioning); low natural SPF gives it sunscreen properties; antibacterial, antifungal, anti-inflammatory; shelf-stable and long-lasting due to high level of antioxidants
Jojoba oil:  Softening and moisturizing, closely emulating natural sebum from scalp; highly emollient and nutritive; easily absorbed; does not turn rancid and requires no refrigeration.
Castor oil:  Emollient, lubricating, absorbent; high level of fatty acids; soothing to hair and scalp; stimulates hair growth.
Lavender EO:  Adaptogenic – normalizes both dry and oily conditions for the hair and scalp; antimicrobial; anti-inflammatory; skin regenerative; great for sensitive or mature skin; aids in dandruff and hair loss.
Lemon EO:  Antiseptic, astringent, antibacterial, cleansing, cell regenerative, regulates sebum production, shine-enhancing, effective for inflamed skin and dandruff conditions.
Lemongrass EO:  Antiseptic, astringent and stimulating; antifungal; natural bug deterrent.
Peppermint EO:  Cooling, cleansing, stimulating, invigorating, antiseptic, toning, anti-inflammatory, good for dermatitis and dandruff conditions.
Rosemary EO:  Great for darkening the hair; helps hair grown and thicken; fantastic conditioner; antiseptic, cleansing; stimulates skin; rejuvenates cells; helps prevent hair loss and thinning; strengthens hair; great for dandruff and dermatitis.
Sage EO:  Astringent, antiseptic, invigorating, stimulating; effective for hair loss and sensitive skin.

Favorite sources used:

Things I Make